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HOW DO YOU DEAL?
By Jeana Esser


Reach out and text….

Communication is defined as "the imparting or exchange of information, ideas, or feelings ; something communicated, such as a message, letter, or telephone call". There are also those aspects of communication, such as gestures and facial expressions, that do not involve verbal communication but which may include nonverbal aspects of speech itself (accent, tone of voice, speed of speaking, body language, etc.)……those particular aspects which are absent in an email or a text message. Texting has indeed, crippled our emotional integrity and our incentive to look one another in the eye.
I was sitting in a local eatery several months ago and I will never forget what was going on at the table next to me. There was a grown-up couple and about 3 kids. The kids were texting one another AT THE TABLE. Since there were three of them, I am guessing that the two older ones were talking about the younger one, who may or may not have had a phone, or perhaps they were talking about the grownups. At least they were quiet, and continued on with their texting while the grown ups chatted endlessly amongst themselves, with little regard to the wee ones. Something seemed terribly wrong. So is what the family dinner table has become?
It has taken millions of years for the world to find effective ways to communicate effectively with one other. Even back in the Prehistoric Days, before the onset of the English language, the locals had to scribble pictures on the wall of a cave whilst evoking all kinds of emotion in the process to get their ideas across to one another. This at least required thought. Then, with the onset of technology, the silent film industry evolved from talking without words to actually auditory entertainment. However, in the silent movies, the gestures and body language themselves were obvious enough to decipher, so the meanings were still quite "readable".
The digital age has no doubt become responsible for stupefying most of the world, especially the young people. Texting, definitely not a new subject to be "talked" about, has gotten totally out of hand, and I am also guilty, but just stating the facts here. I'll be the first one to say that texting has saved me oodles of time in many arenas. Texting has made it easy for us to become physically and emotionally lazy. Because of the simplicity of texting, many of us, especially young people, are losing sight of what it is to use real sentences with correct punctuation and correct spelling, as well as interpersonal communication with each other.
The worst thing about texting in my opinion, is the void of face-to-face interaction. It makes it entirely too easy to lie to someone due to the lack of body language and actual synergy between human beings. Oh, but wait. Let's not forget about emoticons. Though quick and humorous, they are no substitute for real anger and tears. Of course, you can always use ALL CAPS for the anger part I suppose and an "un" smiley face for sadness. Some even go so far as to use texting for "break-ups", and of course, one can just simply not return the texts, which can often mean a number of things from not actually hearing the phone, battery dying out, phone being lost or having fallen in the toilet, to sheer avoidance, the equivalent of not answering the door. Either way, I guess you can say that it IS in some respects, communication, but not necessarily the personal kind.
I can appreciate that the world is evolving, but is it really? I might say quite the contrary. I mean, when you have a table full of people and some of them are texting, something is terribly wrong. Since the onset of the computer, communication as we know it has become faster, deadlines get met much more efficiently, but as far as effective communication goes…..well there is a communication breakdown…on many levels. It all started with e-mailing. I remember seeing this cartoon several years back where this man walks into a florist underneath a "say it with flowers" sign and asks for 3 flowers. The florist looking rather puzzled handed him only 3 flowers, then the man said, "I'm a man of a few words". At least that guy was communicating the old fashioned way, and not sending an "e-card". I don't know about you, but I like getting letters in the mail sealed with wax, and with real handwriting. I realize that texting most assuredly has its good points. It comes in handy when you are running late, respond with a quick yes or no, let someone know that you are thinking of him/her or want to give your loved one a quick goodnight and send him/her a kiss (the emoticon for kiss is a smiley face sans the outer parenthesis and an asterisk *). I am, however, still a believer of some form of verbal communication and when I am not at work, I try to communicate with verbal and non-verbal gestures. There is nothing quite like the middle finger.



 

e-mail: jjjeanae@yahoo.com

 
 
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